By Nur Afiqah Bte Mohd Azman
Emotional healing is not a widely discussed topic so here I am addressing the issue of emotional healing. Emotional healing is the most important stress coping mechanism that we can utilize in the process of our recovery.
When I was at the brink of a mental breakdown, I was clueless as to how am I going to get up from my fall and mend all the broken pieces together. My counselor mentioned about forgiveness. And it began rooting in my mind. I began searching online on the topic that is linked to emotional healing. And I found it. To attain emotional healing, we need to learn to forgive ourselves and most importantly and foremost, to forgive others.
What is forgiveness? Why does it matter in our emotional healing?
It is about extending mercy to those who have caused resentment within us. It is about us processing and forgiving even if they do not really deserve it.
This will increase our self-esteem, inner strength and safety within us. It will grant us emotional healing and allow us to move on in life with meaning and purpose. It really matters as it results in a strong psychological benefit. In its entirety, it will reduce anxiety, depression and unhealthy anger. Thus, forgiveness is connected to our emotional healing and helps us to recover from mental health issues.
How do we deal with the “offending message”?
Whatever words they say negatively and it disturbs our peace of mind, these words are the “offending message”. To deal with this, we have to dig out the true message behind the message. Ask yourself, “ What are they trying to say?” Beware not to mix this offending message with the previous one.
They are like traffic signals. If we dwell on them too much, we will feel worse. So, to feel better, just let the thoughts to pass through us and don’t pay to attention to them after digging out the true message behind the words that are offending to us. After lots of practice, I am able to cope with the emotional turmoil that is always burning inside me and all the grudges I have with others, slowly dissipates back into the universe where it belongs.
I would like to give a quote.
“ To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner is you” by Lewis B. Smedes.
Forgiving oneself is as crucial in maintaining our mental well-being. Self-blaming has been the egoistic self- damaging mechanism of our inner peace.
“What is wrong with me? Why am I always repeating the same mistakes?
“Oh God, I did it again. I am stupid.”
“I am not smart enough. I blame myself for everything.”
These dialogues must be the common self-blaming action to our self within all of us. We just could not help it. We beat ourselves all the time. We are just never enough to be perfect.
We need to make a U turn and make it positive. Let’s change that, shall we?
“ It is okay. There is always next time.”
“ I will learn for every mistake that I made. Great job self!”
“I am smart enough. It is just not the right time to make it right. Everything is going to be okay. I forgive myself.”
This positive self-talk is a forgiveness tool to apply for stress-coping mechanism. It is useful. Once you get it right, your life is a breeze.
Thanks for thanking the time to read this article about emotional healing! See you on the next one. Ciao!